13 Tips on Talking Politics at the Thanksgiving Dinner Table

This election has sucked, let’s be real. It’s been nasty, divisive, mean. Chances are you’re bitter and/or hypertensive; you may have developed some new sort of stress-related infection or had the lining of your esophagus eaten away by acid reflux. And now it’s Thanksgiving, only two weeks after the election, and you’ve got to talk to your relatives. Your relatives who—at least for the premises of this article—you don’t agree with politically and voted for Trump. Now—ulp!—you’ve got to sit down and make nice for a few hours over pie and turkey. You can, of course, try to divert the conversation and stick to non-political topics—sports, TV, Cousin Bernie’s trip to Costa Rica. But this tactic may fail. Hell, it probably will, especially once Grandma’s gotten into the sherry or ol’ Uncle Hank’s started in about George Soros. Toward this eventuality, and in hopes that your holiday season will be a more pleasant experience than a grinding one, we here at Chasing the Rabbit have prepared a list of tips which we have found helpful in dealing with political arguments during the holidays.

1. Move to Florida for a year.

2-10. Move across the country (at least 3000 miles, preferably with a mountain range or two, a few state lines, a nice big river–this should be easy enough in the continental United States), so that a visit is impractical at best—more of an airplane flight deal than a simple drive.

11. Maintain a comparative radio silence—don’t contact your relatives outside of a nodding acquaintance on Facebook, the odd vacation meetup, maybe a phone call once or twice a year.

12. Spend Thanksgiving with your friends instead. Remember, you don’t have to put up with some jackass just because they’re family.

13. Enjoy your holiday and celebrate the way you like it.

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About docmagnus

I write things and draw things. Sometimes I do both at the same time. Sometimes I put what I wrote and drew on the Internet for people to see.

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